i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I have tasted many bathrooms
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
