Don't you send me to vm
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize