i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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