sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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