he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
