Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
