: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
