It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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