he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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