As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
