Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
We need to rekindle our bromance
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
