I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize