worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
