apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
