And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
