so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Randomize
