"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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