Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
