Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
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