I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
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