Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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