we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize