I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Randomize