if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
