based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
