The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
i need some magic done to my vagina
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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