that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
the condom got lost in my hair
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
