On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I AM VODKA MAN
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
