How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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