yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
