He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
