Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
