You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize