that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
