those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
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