Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
So much Jack, so little girl.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
