Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
my shit smells like andre
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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