He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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