in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
nutella sex= disaster
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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