So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
