I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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