I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
