OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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