Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
