can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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