so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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