i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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