I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
this will be a night to untag.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Randomize