I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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