when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
do nipples grow back?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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