im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
