Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
